We Don't Live in Happy Valley Anymore

Well, we have been living in Hawaii for a little over two months now and lets just say we have meet quite a few interesting characters besides the bums Ryan has befriended on the pier! Today while I was at work, I had one of those moments when you just can't stop laughing on the inside for how funny the situation is! I was talking to the lady who sells time shares in a booth by us . She is in her 50's, definitely a little worn around the edges, and has a pair of designer transition lenses to go with every outfit. She loves CROCS, she drives a 1929 Model A to work everyday, and she loves to talk. She is AN OPEN BOOK in every way!!! I'm going to list our favorite quotes from her. And I'm going to start with the best one ever and it happened today! FAVORITE QUOTES: "Well, you see the first time I made love I got gonorrhea so bad that I could never have kids. Yeah, he was a Vietnam vet so that's where he got it....I was only 17....I mean that's old for today, but I was the last one of all my friends to do it!" "I was on a dating show in Australia, and I picked contestant #1 because he had a boat!" "When I was younger I was living in Morocco....Oh I hate those people, they treat women like crap... I was raped there." "Oh no, don't be talking about grapes, it's making me think of wine....I can't drink anymore....ya, I'm in recovery....I spent 8 weeks at Betty Ford clinic and it cost me $30,000." "I was putting vodka in my morning smoothies.....seriously, I would drink 2 bottles of wine a day." "Yeah I know George....oh, do I know George, we used to PPPAARARRTYY together...whew, some good times, I mean some good times. Ya, for sure he'll let me park my car here!" Well, this was just a little sampling from the 3 days a week she works by us. All in all she is a cool lady who just likes to tell it how it is. She for sure makes the day go by faster and always provides entertainment! Every time I hear her latest story it reminds me we are no longer in Utah Valley!